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Sean Roberts

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Florida Man Uses COVID Loan To Buy $5M Mansion, Gets 8 Years

Sean Roberts January 13th
He bought a Maserati, a Mercedes and a mansion.

Most of us can agree that 2020 sucked. We wore face masks nonstop, we obsessed over hand sanitizer and we wondered how we were ever gonna financially recover from not working for a full year. But some people did pretty well during the pandemic. Take the case of Don Cisternino, a 47-year-old Seminole County businessman who secured $7.2 million dollars in PPP funds (Paycheck Protection Program) to keep his company operational. The payments were designed to help employers make it through a hellish 2020 by making sure their payrolls and bills got paid on time. The program helped countless companies keep their businesses afloat in unsure times. But that’s not what happened.
Authorities say Cisternino used his fraudulently acquired millions to buy several luxury cars and an almost $5 million dollar mansion located in Seminole County. Court documents showed that Cisternino filed for and received $7.2 million dollars in May of 2020. He claimed that his company employed 441 people and his payroll was almost $3 million dollars in 2019. That was not true. In fact, Cisternino was the only employee at his company. Cisternino was convicted of using false information when he submitted tax information about people who had never worked for him.
Once the loan was approved by the federal government, records show that Cistrernino bought a Maserati and a Mercedes-Benz. But that’s not the whole story. He also bought a 12-acre estate with a 12,579 square foot mansion. That home is currently for sale for $4.9 million dollars. The special agent in charge, Ronald Loecker from the IRS, says this case should “serve as a warning for those who may have engaged in similar fraudulent activity”. He went on to say that the IRS will continue to investigate and prosecute fraudulently acquired PPP fund cases. Cisternino was ordered to forfeit over a million dollars that was seized from various bank accounts. He was also ordered to return the $7.2 million dollars that he obtained from the scheme. He was even ordered to pay $7.44 million dollars to the Small Business administration as restitution. Cisternino was sentenced to 8 1/2 years in federal prison on charges of wire fraud, aggravated identity theft and illegal monetary transaction. Source: WFLA.com

Friday The 13th Superstitions

Friday the 13th - Bizarre Superstitions from Around the World

Friday the 13th is upon us and actually, it’s set to happen one more time this year in October. Does that mean this will be an exceptionally spooky or unlucky year? I don’t personally think so, but I don’t find myself to be particularly unlucky either. That being said, people all over the world find this day quite unlucky and have some interesting superstitions to combat any unwanted bad mojo.

The history of Friday the 13th being unlucky is a bit vague. There are some reports that it dates back to Norse Mythology, Jesus’ Last Supper and even Wall Street.

  • Throw Salt Over Your Shoulder

    Anyone who is superstitious knows if you spill salt, you have to throw it over your left shoulder. That apparently comes from Ancient Romans who believed that would ward off the devil. It was said that it would hit him in the face and blind him. Seems kinda rude in my opinion, but I don’t have the devil following me around. At least I don’t think. Spilling salt is also associated with Jesus since in Leonardo da Vinci’s painting The Last Supper, you see Judas spilling salt. Maybe he was just clumsy? Either way, if you spill salt on Friday the 13th or any other time DO NOT under any circumstances do what Harry did in ‘Dumb & Dumber.’

     

  • Broomsticks - Not Just For Witches

    This one doesn’t sit well with me for a bunch of reasons, but here we go. This superstition says that if you don’t want to be single for the rest of your life, don’t let a broom sweep across your feet. If it does happen, there is a way to reverse it, but it’s gross. If a broom sweeps across your feet, make sure you IMMEDIATELY spit on that broom! Take that, witches mode of transportation! I couldn’t find the origin of this one, but it’s said that a woman (I’m going to include all people in this though) that can’t keep the house tidy, is not a good partner. But sure, spitting on the broom is super clean.

    Workers Disinfect Schools Ahead Of Reopening

     (Photo by Lauren DeCicca/Getty Images)

  • The Number Four

    This comes from the Eastern Asia area and is similar to our fear of the number thirteen. In China, the sound of “four” sounds like death and in Korea and Japan, four and death are actually the same. At least thirteen is a prime number? Not sure that counts for anything.

    China Celebrates Spring Festival

    (Photo by Kevin Frayer/Getty Images)

  • Rabbit, Rabbit, Ya Say?

    As someone who has lived their entire life in North America, I have never heard of this, but apparently people on this continent believe that if you say “rabbit, rabbit” on the first of the month, it will bring you luck. I’ve heard that rabbits feet are lucky, but this one is new to me.

    Bunnies Attract Tourists To A Japanese Islet Okunoshima

    (Photo by Chris McGrath/Getty Images)

     

  • Don't Walk Backwards!

    People in Portugal believe that if you walk backwards, it’s an invitation for the devil since you’re showing him where you live or where you’re going. What if I’m going to the dumpster though?

    Ivory Coast v Portugal: Group G - 2010 FIFA World Cup

    (Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty Images)

  • Tuck Your Thumbs, Save a Life!

    People in Japan believe that when you visit the cemetery, you must tuck your thumbs. This is a similar superstition to the number four… Kinda.”Thumb” means “parent figure” in Japanese so by tucking your thumb, you are protecting your parent from death. Seems logical.

    Richmond Tigers Training Session

     (Photo by Robert Cianflone/Getty Images)

  • Cue Up Amii Stewart and Knock On Wood!

    I feel like we all know this one. I know I’ve been saying “knock on wood” since I was a kid, but did you know there are a bunch of different origins? The Celtic or Indo-European belief is that by knocking on wood, you are calling on spirits or gods of trees for protection. There was also a game in the 19th century called ‘Tiggy Touchwood’ (which sounds like an HR violation) where the players who are touching wood stay in the game. Other cultures have similar variations of this belief like touching steel, poles, unpainted wood, wood with no legs or knocking on wood twice. All I know is that the music video for Amii Stewarts “Knock On Wood” is FANTASTIC.

     

  • Don't Say Happy Birthday If It's Not

    In Russia they believe that if you wish someone a happy birthday before their actual birthday it will bring bad luck. Fortunately, if you forget to wish someone a happy birthday you can still do it. If we know anything about Russia, it’s that you follow the rules so don’t do this if you ever go there!

    St James's Park Lake Is Dredged To Clear Silt From The Bottom

    (Photo by Dan Kitwood/Getty Images)

  • Don't Give Me Dandelions!

    I don’t know if dandelions are actually flowers and this isn’t specific to them, but more so yellow flowers in general. In Russia, if you give someone yellow flowers it is considered inappropriate. Not in an HR violation kind of way, but more like it is said to bring problems in relationships like separation, infidelity and death. Again, if you happen to be in Russia, don’t even look at a yellow flower just for your own safety.

    U.S. Botanic Garden Opens New National Garden

    (Photo by Brendan Smialowski/Getty Images)

  • A Lemon A Day Keeps Evil Away

    This is very common in Indian culture. Lemons along with chilies will be hung outside the home to stop evil spirits and bad omens from entering your home. You can also hang them on your car or bike, and after that maybe make a nice marinade.

    "Essential" Workers Keep American Life Going During Coronavirus Pandemic

    (Photo by Brent Stirton/Getty Images.)

Since You Didn’t Watch It, Here’s The Highlights

2023 Golden Globes Red Carpet Looks: Worst to Best

Kicking off the year’s first big red carpet event is the 2023 Golden Globes. The stars put their best feet forward when showing up at the Beverly Hilton Tuesday (January 10) evening. There were more pregnant women than we expected, but they all dressed for two in the best of ways. Take a look below at the best looks of the night, ranked worst to best:

Sean Roberts was conceived in the Corvette Assembly Plant in Bowling Green, Kentucky by two passionate, panel aligning, third shifters who had grown bored with the same ole same ole. Upon birth, he was placed in the trunk of a new Stingray and sent off to find his destiny. That destiny included several stints on radio stations across the United States. Some played punk country gospel, while others focused on Croatian death metal played backwards. After many years and many adventures, Sean wound up on The Shark, where he does shots of tequila while playing the most badass tunes ever created by humankind. He remains humble, however, never forgetting about the lean years...the street corners and dark alleys where he played songs on his car stereo for food and sex. He's on top and he's never gonna stop LIVING THE DREAM!
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